There can be only one ... or two at most: Many of you have no doubt taken a peek at the new home for my Mariner thoughts. A team blog makes more sense for me, given that interplay with a talented writer like Peter White will be fun, and that both of us are getting busier.

This blog will stay alive, though posting will be less Mariner, more politics and writing. In the meantime, check out Mariner Musings!
posted by Jeff link 9:29 PM [edit]

 
Ichiro Is Everywhere!:

"Yeah, everybody's got a little bit of Elvis in 'em.
Everybody except one person.
The evil opposite of Elvis.
the Anti-Elvis."
--Mojo Nixon

If, as Mojo posits, we are all moving in perfect peace and harmony toward Elvisness -- as part of a process called ElvisLution -- then Ichiro is surely further along than most.


Musically, Nixon suggests that The King's doppelganger is Michael J. Fox, who reflected very little Elvisness in his role as Alex P. Keaton. After tonight's paean to Ichiro!, I asked myself: Self, who is the evil opposite of Ichiro?


Just then came the dulcet tones of Ron Fairly. "And there's strike three on Bloomquist, his second strikeout in as many at bats since he replaced Justin Leone."


Too perfect.


Follow me as I prove using undisputable scientific facts that Willie Bloomquist is, in fact, the evil opposite of Ichiro: the Anti-Ichiro.

TALE OF THE TAPE:


Bloomquist: bats right
Ichiro: bats left


Bloomquist: white
Ichiro: not


Bloomquist: has both lowest Equivalent Average and lowest Value Over Replacement Player (-5.6!) among regular M's (with more than 100 plate appearances). His .216 EqA is even lower than Scott Spiezio's
Ichiro: has both highest EqA (.312) and highest VORP (50.6) among regular M's


Bloomquist: from Port Orchard
Ichiro: from Kasugai, Japan, about as far from Port Orchard as you can get


Bloomquist: can't get down a bunt, even as a sacrifice
Ichiro: regularly bunts for base hits


Bloomquist: considered a poor man's Charles Gipson
Ichiro: considered a rich man's Kenny Lofton, or maybe is just much richer than Kenny Lofton


Bloomquist: primarily an infielder, allegedly can play the outfield
Ichiro: outstanding defensive outfielder


Bloomquist: slogan associated with him is "Wolf Pride"
Ichiro: slogan "baseball is just baseball" embodies philosophy of Zen-like grace, has inspired book


Bloomquist: He'll turn 27 in November, and is batting .239 with an OBP of .261 and a SLG of .291, may be league's Least Valuable Player
Ichiro: When he was 27, was hitting .350 and stealing 56 bases on his way to the league Most Valuable Player award


The non-similarities are eerie. Anyone else feel those Twilight Zone chills?


Let's just hope Ichiro doesn't high-five Bloomquist after a base hit. The reaction might be like matter versus anti-matter.


Lest the blog become to pessimistic: Is there a more enjoyable player to watch on the Mariners than Bobby Madritsch? Ichiro! and Bucky Jacobsen are the only players that I have as much fun tracking. Even if the guy weren't a great story -- a tattooed Lakota refugee from the independent leagues -- he pitches fearlessly, and there's a lot to be said for that in terms of watchability. This is somebody to root for.




posted by Jeff link 7:43 PM [edit]

 
With tonight's effort -- he's 4 for 4 with five RBI as of this writing -- Ichiro has 60 multihit games on the season. This is the Mariners' 118th game.

People going to see the Mariners this year have a better than one-in-three chance of seeing two or more hits from Ichiro. Excuse me: from Ichiro!.
posted by Jeff link 7:12 PM [edit]

Monday, August 16, 2004

 
The TV Critic becomes The Dance Critic:

Between the third and fourth innings yesterday, the Safeco Field grounds crew stopped grooming the infield to perform one of its cutesy dance routines to the tune, "There's No Business Like Show Business."

One fan in the spendy seats was so stirred that she gave the crew a standing ovation.

In truth, it wasn't deserved. The dancers' spacing was off and their movements out of sync.

Hey Mike, maybe Levesque should start posting his reviews of grounds crew dance performances on the P-I blog. It could be like American Bandstand meets Rob Ryder's ESPN column: "Well, I liked the guy with the rake, I gave him a 43."

I smell a boost to unique hits! Or maybe that's just the bullpen that stinks.
posted by Jeff link 10:40 AM [edit]